Sunday, January 22, 2006

The Frost Bites in Jordan....!!!

I don't know about you, but being cold was a good thing to me. I like being cold and freezing conditions, but this is silly....!!!

I handle colder temperatures fine, but I don't know why this time is different. although the same situation happened 5 years ago in Kuwait, the desert in the winter is hectic and the icy air infiltrates to the core of your bones.....!!!
but that was 5 temperatures below freezing, on an exposed Eur'zala (عرزالة), and not having anything to wear (being half naked as a waged bet to see how Psychrophilic I can get).

Also in the 2002 new year's mourning, I got woke up by my dad, to chisel a snowman in our backyard, which was a meter thick in ice.....!!! and apparently the reason for this wacky idea was the our neighbors, American diplomats were doing their iceman and playing as you all noticed from the movies or series, but here is the thing, when they are out they are loaded with clothe not like what I did, yeah I didn't have the chance to wash my face, or change....!!! so I enter the back yard wearing only my shorts and a "fanela eel’lag" no boots no socks no nothing, I'm up to my knees in snow, and the temperature shock kicks in, I wake up now, and realize that my father is filming the whole thing.....!!!

So I implement the anger on the lower ranks, and ask my younger brother to bring me the shovel, and this one is no ordinary shovel, it's almost a meter in width so I gaze up to the Yankees, they solute, I solute back, but I like to tell my friends that I used my trademark two-barreled shotgun finger salute....!!!

I shovel almost the entire backyard which is quit big, and to make it worse our's were the biggest in the area and the garden was filled with flowers not trees.....!!! so it soon started to get misty around me.....!!! and this steam is coming out from my body like something is burning, I look around and see the jaw of my brother is closer to the ground than usual, my father stopped shooting and asks me if every thing is alright....?!?! "yeah but it's starting to get hot here", "are you mad....?!?! it's 25 degrees below freezing" opps.... I forgot to mention that I was living in Shmolicova, the Czech Republic, and while steaming I realized that the earth is worm due to isolation of the ice to the outer atmosphere
(talk about Nerd mentality), in the end I did a sculptured snowman which my neighbors thought at first to be an Angel, "how adorable" this 16 year old brunette murmured to her father, yeah I heard her, but after I finished from painting it they knew how far it was from the truth.....!!! for I made a tribute to the one and only.....!!!
Superman that is….?!?!?!

Now back to the Jordanian frost bite....!!! and to explain it to you, this creepy pervert of frost is targeting my toes, the cold is overwhelming them, coating my digits and paralyzing them even though I wear now to extra pair of socks that make me feel like skating in the living room of my apartment.....!!!
It's so cold in here that if I wanted to keep food worm I have to place them in the FREDGE. The meat is in my room, and everything now is rock solid including water, which I have to heat to allow safe drinking, I actually found a new way to cook food, by over burning the meat with below freezing temperatures.....!!! you don't believe me, it's all right, neither do I.....?!?!?!

My toes are now beyond the blue, actually they now have colors that I can't seem to find in both Arabic or English, and not even Benetton have that color....!!! I burnt the small childish toe in the process of trying to get my feet worm, but I still don't get to feel anything....!!! sometimes I feel like my toes are sinking through the ground, but the ground is still solid, so why do I have this feeling, I never know.....!!!

If I ever have the chance to meet the guy who suggested the "SOLAR" way to heat up things in Jordan you'll most certainly read about it in the news papers....!!! and for god's sake can anyone tell me how the hell am I supposed to work with this "Sobba" that looks like Aladdin’s forgotten lamp.....!!! it's a major contributor to CO2 pollution in the world, it smokes like a oily truck on the way to the ASU.....!!!
this "Sobba" actually can easily qualify to be a new trendy make up tool, that girls would definitely seek to try on in the next years, after each time we use this "Sobba" I find myself irritated to the bone and itchy and scratchy in the nostrils and eyes....!!! when I first tried to wash my eyes I frightened my self, cause what I saw in the mirror was something wearing Geisha’s make-up, like a huge amount of "Kih'el" around my eyes, which reminded me of LBC's Star Crying Academy where all the girls walk around with the drooling make-up crossed by the Crow's eye shadowing....!!!

Enough rambling for today, my fingers are numb, I'm cold, and I feel like tiny animals are massaging my toes with their teeth....!!! feel sleepy, can't light the matches though....!!!

Am I dieing.....!!! I see that in Hollywood movies all the time....!!! don't sleep people....?!?! that and not going to the operation room, all the Egyptian movies kill their heroes by sending them to the O.R. ....!!! Is it the doctor's fault or the director's....!!!
I can't seem to find out way.....!!! can you.....!!!

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